2011: The Year of the Aardvark

Final (?) Thinkings on Cerebus

Sun, 01 Jan 2012 13:40:56 -0500

This blog was never about deconstructing Cerebus, psycho-analyzing Dave Sim, or any of that. It was simple a year long read-a-long. I’d only ever read the first phonebook (and a couple crossovers in other comics), and had always had this as part of my geek Bucket List - read all 300 issues.

So I have. And I have mixed feelings. I may even come back in 3-6 months and cogitate further… but that’s not a promise.

As far as the comic goes, I cannot truly recommend reading all 300 issues. Read through Mothers and Daughters, and stop with issue #200. Stop there and make up your own ending for Cerebus’ story. Maybe he learned some hard lessons and was a better aardvark. Maybe he was the same jackass. Maybe he died young, maybe he died old.

Even the first 200 issues aren’t perfect - there’s so much wasted potential for just great adventure/drama storytelling. But the first 200 are DEFINITELY worth reading. When he’s on, it’s some of the best comic book storytelling of all time, no exaggeration.

—

Thank you for riding along with me last year. If you’re inclined to follow my other scribblings/bloggings/etc, you can find me on Twitter - @cr8dv8, my personal Tumblr (lots of reblogs, photos from my life, links and occasional posts by me) is http://cr8dv8.tumblr.com/ , my hodge-podge of a blog can be found at http://betterblogthanyours.wordpress.com/ and my creative writing twitter account is @TerryWrites

Also, if you’re a Doctor Who fan, or know of any, let them know about my year long project for 2012 - a viewing/reviewing of ALL original 26 seasons of the original run from 1963-1989, the first Seven Doctors’ serials. It can be found at http://classicdoctorwho2012.wordpress.com/ (there will be an introductory post later today, 1.1.12)

Again, many thanks. If you have any comments, please submit them via http://2011yota.tumblr.com/ask

Cerebus 300 “Latter Days 35”

Thu, 22 Dec 2011 10:00:05 -0500

This is it, the end. Cerebus dies. Leaping from the bed, he stumbles on the stairs of his bed, they tip and he falls head forward. Farting on the way down, and thanking God for that, he lands head first and breaks his neck. We see scenes of him from various stages of his life flash before his eyes, then his spirit (young and wearing the vest) steps from his body.

A great light strikes down and he sees so many that have passed before. He’s a bit afraid, until he sees Ham, Jaka and Bear, beckoning to him. He’s delighted, and transforms into Rabbi so that he might fly up there. Halfway there, he realises that Rick is not there, and therefore it must not be Heaven/where he wants to go. He tries to fight it, calls out to God, but he is sucked in.

The end.

Yes, it’s anti-climatic, but it couldn’t be anything else. As prophesied, he dies alone, unloved.

At the end of the month, I’ll have a couple posts talking about the series as a whole. Thank you for riding along with me.

Cerebus 299 “Latter Days 34”

Wed, 21 Dec 2011 10:00:05 -0500

Shep-Shep starts asking questions about various claims Cerebus has made – apparently his relationship with Jaka is not public knowledge/part of the official story of his life. Other things are questioned, but Cerebus asks what’s in the box, trying to change the subject. Shep-Shep informs him that Cirin is still alive but “in worse shape” than Cerebus. However, New Joanne and her followers have been learning Cirin’s secrets. They’ve taken to cloning, and the thing in the box is a lion cub with a human head, the head cloned from Shep-Shep. They have plans to make one that is a giant and take it to Egypt (suddenly we’re in our history, now? It was confusing enough with the Torah being part of the continuity – I thought this was all set tens of thousands of years before our written history.)

Anyhow, it becomes obvious that Shep-Shep and his mother are insane. Cerebus confronts Shep’s claims, he gets mad, and after talking about Muslims (?!?!?), he storms out. Cerebus pulls a dagger from beneath his pillow and intends to follow and kill Shep-Shep and (apparently) New Joanne, too.

Cerebus 298 “Latter Days 33”

Tue, 20 Dec 2011 10:05:05 -0500

We start out with a multi-page pan out, showing us that night has fallen. We go all the way out ot the gate of the Sanctuary, where two derelicts/junkies/whatever are slumped against the gate, which is locked. Then we zoom in, this time we hear someone fiddling with a key and lock, and when we get back to Cerebus’ chamber, Shep-Shep enters. He carries a box with something living inside (it has air holes and there’s skritching sounds.)

There’s banter, we find out Shep-Shep’s real name is Sheshep Ankh, but Cerebus discovers it didn’t mean “Beloved of God” as New Joanne told him, but it’s Egyptian for “Living Symbol”. This seems to carry some weight with Cerebus. They talk more, about New Joanne and her version of how Cerebus and her first met.

Wow, something actually happened! Even with a bunch of unnecessary pages.

Cerebus 297 “Latter Days 32”

Mon, 19 Dec 2011 10:00:05 -0500

Back to one issue per day.

Cerebus struggles to the door, bends over, picks up the statement and pen, signs it, hands it through the door, struggles back to the bed arguing with himself internally, his “heartburn” flares up (and he clutches his left arm, tell tale sign of an impending heart-attack, esp. combined with the heartburn), but he makes it to his bed. The “happy sappy” voice in his head is quiet all of a sudden, but he stops to pray first, then crawls in bed and wonders why he feels like saying “Rosebud” all of a sudden.

The sad thing is it took a whole issue to do all of that. Multiple pages of Cerebus shuffling and bending over to pick up the statement and pen. REALLY? How fucking useless and pointless can you get? (How badly can you say “oh fuck, I have no story this issue, let me just stretch it out”?) Fucking lame.

295 and 296

Sat, 17 Dec 2011 10:00:05 -0500

295 “Latter Days 30”

296 “Latter Days 31”

Cerebus eats cheese and argues with the guard outside the door. His attempts to threaten and bribe the vetoer into changing his vote have not succeeded. Shep-Shep has arrived, but Cerebus has not been let out to see him.

Cerebus’ heartburn acts up, he falls asleep/passes out and has a dream that he interprets that his goose is cooked. I’m guessing he’s having a heart attack. He wakes up and finds out that he has to sign a statement if he wants to see his son.

See you next week.

293 and 294

Fri, 16 Dec 2011 10:00:06 -0500

293 “Latter Days 28”

294 “Latter Days 29”

Sigh. We get a comic full of old body jokes, fart jokes to find out that the bureaucracy that Cerebus set up is keeping his son from seeing him b/c they’re afraid that C wants to have sex with his son. o.0

While waiting the resolution of that, Cerebus recalls something about a music festival and abortion rights being why his son left/hasn’t been around.

I…

Six more issues! Yay! Almost done!

Cerebus 291 and 292

Thu, 15 Dec 2011 10:00:06 -0500

291 “Latter Days 26” (no sub-title)

291 “Latter Days 27”

An ancient Cerebus wakes up from the dream of the Creation story. He goes downstairs, which takes pages of stupid bits about Cerebus complaining about body parts. I guess it’s supposed to be funny? He finally gets there and starts writing the dream down as a book. He writes it down, hides it where a voice (Dave?) directs him to, and is told in 2000 years, when the building is razed to build a shopping mall, it will be found. Cerebus then tries to leave to go pray but is told by the guard outside the locked door that the sanctuary is under lockdown, fear of a Joannist attack. Cerebus asks when his son, Shep-Shep, is due to visit, and is informed that his son hasn’t been to visit in 10, maybe 15 years. Cerebus sits down and cries and we see a younger (well, not-ancient) Cerebus walking with a young boy, a flashback as Cerebus sits and cries.

And despite it all, despite how much the writer is an ass, the story is just fucking stupid at times, and how much I’d love to beat the living fuck out of Cerebus, I couldn’t help but go, “Awwww.”

Cerebus cannot remember what happened with his son. We see a montage of images over the years, Cerebus and a boy, Cerebus and a teen, Cerebus and a young man, Cerebus and a man – all his son, obviously. Cerebus pouts and argues with himself and finally decides to pray, and when he starts, he gets the news that his son is on the way, coming to see him that very day. Cerebus begins thanking God.

Cerebus 288 and 289/290

Wed, 14 Dec 2011 10:00:06 -0500

288 “Latter Days 23: Chasing YHWH VII: The Final Cobweb”

289/290 “Latter Days 24/25: Chasing YHWY VIII: The Final Twinkle/XI: The Ultimate Roman Numeral”

Cerebus is answering questions from someone who turns out to be Jaka. Or a Jaka lookalike (not a like-a-look, mind you.) Cerebus and whomever she is are kissing and he pronounces them husband and wife so they can have sex w/o fornicating. She asks him if she reminds him of Joanne at all, and he swears that she doesn’t, just as we see who she looks like.

289/290 is a double issue and begins “Latter Days Book Two: The Last Day” with a dream of the Creation story. Again, I just don’t even care enough to bother reading it.

Cerebus 286 and 287

Tue, 13 Dec 2011 10:00:05 -0500

286 “Latter Days 21: Chasing YHWH V: The Final Page”

287 “Latter Days 22: Chasing YHWH VI: The Final Flower”

More of the same. There’s a couple pages of panel discussing Cerebus getting fat and exercising. I think he says he’s only 46, which completely throws off the calendar, cuz I thought it was year 60 something of the new regime that he met K. Not that I care enough to try to find out.

OH THANK GOD IT’S OVER. It IS over, right? Right? I’m afraid to pick up the next issue to find out.

Anyone who touts this as art or whatever is just as pretentious a twaddle-nose as Sim.

Cerebus #284 and 285

Mon, 12 Dec 2011 10:00:06 -0500

284 “Latter Days 19: Chasing YHWH III”

285 “Latter Days 20: Chasing YHWH IV: The Final Chapter”

More of the same – a few more panels, this time. Konigsberg’s wife cheated on him, left him, so Cerebus takes him to a park where they keep the evil, beautiful women. (Oh, this is just dumb.) Then it’s more bullshit reading the Torah and lots of boring words that honestly, I can’t be assed to read. Cerebus wiki sums it up again: Konigsberg talks to Cerebus about how his wife could cheat on him with Beatty. We are witness to Fruitcake Park where the girls who were too evil to live but too beautiful to kill were sent. Cerebus continues his reading of the Torah.

Issue 285 is more of the same – Cerebus and K reading and arguing/discussing/whatever the Torah.

Seriously? Did Sim finally say, “Hey, I bet these assholes will buy anything I write. Let me see how many readers I can lose before we hit 300.”?

Well?

Cerebus #282 and 283

Sat, 10 Dec 2011 10:00:06 -0500

282 “Latter Days 17: Chasing YHWH”

283 “Latter Days 18: Still Chasing YHWH”

I’ll be honest, I can’t even bring myself to read it all. We’re back to copious amounts of prose and a few panels here and there. And it’s juts completely insipid and boring. Who gives a fuck what some moron like Cerebus and Woody Allen have to say about the Torah?

Look, even the Cerebus Wiki people didn’t read it – here’s their summation of #283: Cerebus continues his reading of the Torah. Konigsberg seeks mental help. Cerebus talks about Sodom and Gomorrah.

See you next week. Promise, I’ll be here. Will you?

Cerebus #280 and 281

Fri, 09 Dec 2011 10:00:06 -0500

280 “Latter Days 15: In The Beginning”

281 “Latter Days 16: And It Came to Passe”

Sixty-Eight years since Cerebus took over, he meets Konigsberg, the not so good Samaritan. (Oy.) Konigsberg looks like Woody Allen. (AUGH I’m so tired of the constant, stupid, pointless “Tributes”.)

Years pass; Cerebus and Konigsberg discuss and debate the Torah. Cerebus tears out part of one page at one point. He decides that the name of God is Yoohwhoo (yoo hoo!)

Konigsberg is a student of Dr. Fraud. (Easy joke there.)

Meh.

Cerebus #278 and 279

Thu, 08 Dec 2011 10:01:06 -0500

278 “Latter Days 13: From Whence Wakes The Bird Watcher?”

279 “Latter Days 14: Pretty Flowers, Pretty Sunsets”

Cerebus starts making rules for life in his new nation. Rules that favour men strongly over women, of course. The nation adopts a calendar, Cerebus takes up birdwatching when the nation seems to be running smoothly (though half the time, he’s a Peeping Tom. Yeah, really. What is the point of this?) In the 18^th year of the Nation of Cerebus, Three Stooge Curly has a stroke.

Again, who gives a fuck about this nonsense?

Most of the three stooges retire, are replaced, die (much like the real ones, though this doesn’t make this part any more salient or interesting). Cerebus dedicates himself to collecting the complete 150 issue run of RABBI, and becomes the biggest Rabbi expert in Estarcion.

He later finds an interview with the writer of Rabbi, Garth something or another (Ennis, cuz Rabbi is a riff on Preacher) where it is revealed that Garth found out Cerebus was a fan of Rabbi and after he realised that Cerebus wasn’t coming to get him, he used the story to manipulate Cerebus into attacking the Cirinists. Cerebus falls into a stupor for days, walking around and pointing at random objects saying only, “Darrr, Pretty Flowers” or “Darrr, Pretty Sunsets.” This end when someone arrives with a book for him, as prophesied by Rick.

Cerebus #276 and 277

Wed, 07 Dec 2011 10:00:06 -0500

276 “Latter Days 11: And Men Shall Call Him Spore”

277 “Latter Days 12: With This Cast & This Bag & This Crutch”

Yowch. Now this subplot I can see being offensive to many people. Cerebus creates a costume to appear as Spore, King of all Demons, and sends Cerebus’ army on a gather, sort, and kill the Bad Women campaign. After forty days of this, Spore retires, proclaiming that every year, the women shall be judged. Cerebus returns from the Pitt, where he ruled in Spore’s absence, and the men start building houses for the women who want to be Angels.

o.0

Guh. Is this supposed to be funny? Is it parody? Or just pure inanity?

Month in Review: November - Going Home/Latter Days

Tue, 06 Dec 2011 10:19:06 -0500

I found the story with Ham Ernestway completely and utterly unnecessary. Especially the flashbacks to Africa.

Later, when Jaka and Cerebus have left them, then, yeah, actual plot development? Stuff about the characters that I (somewhat) care about? The eventual dissolution of Jaka and Cerebus’ little “happy” adventure? That was worth reading.

Latter Days is very hit or miss - and the stuff with the three stooges and the meandering through nonsense - a full issue to tell 5-10 pages of actual story? Ricockulous.

Again, I will be entirely glad when this year is over.

Shameless plug - I’m selling stuff on eBay, over 100 items ending today - http://bit.ly/terrysebay is the custom shortlink. Will be relisting stuff tonight, adding some new comic auctions, too.

Cerebus #275 “Latter Days 10: Avoyd Fornication”

Tue, 06 Dec 2011 10:14:55 -0500

Wow, here we are, a week later than I should have posted this. Yeesh.

And I come back to this project with about five pages of worthwhile story amidst a bunch of drek.

In a nutshell, Cerebus realises that McSpahn (McFarlane) is getting all the credit for the war against the Cirinists (which, since he’s the one actually making the decisions, is appropriate, but Cerebus is a weenie.) So, while the armies are at war, Cerebus has the Three Stooges start transcribing the Book of Cerebus.

Exciting.

Complete brain fart

Mon, 05 Dec 2011 23:58:02 -0500

Just realised, 5 minutes before I go to bed, that I never did today’s posts.

I apologise. Been battling depression the past year-plus (probably longer, likely most of my life, but especially in the recent past) and one of the biggest signs for me that I’m dealing with depression is memory issues. I barely remembered to call in and get an extension on my power bill today - and today was the “pay today or gets shut off tomorrow” deadline.

Okay, tomorrow, the last post of November, the month in review. Then, double posts for the rest of the month until I’m done.

Apparently, I'm taking the week off. :P

Fri, 02 Dec 2011 19:57:39 -0500

This week has just been too draining physically and mentally for me to get any of the issues read; I’ll start Monday, and will do the final issue of last month (275) and the month-in-recap, then double issues the rest of the week, and that should just about get me caught up. I was thinking of doing something like that the week before Xmas, as I don’t know how many people’ll be bothering with blog reading during the holiday week, so I’ll probably just go ahead and do it for the rest of the month until I get done, then do a month and series in review at the end of the month (maybe even NYE for the latter.)

Apologies for the sheer haphazard nature of the blog in general and the past week in specific. Thanks for everyone who’s been following along.

Unplanned Skip Day(s)

Tue, 29 Nov 2011 20:46:58 -0500

#275 is not being posted yet, it hasn’t even been read. I’m jammed up on some stuff that has to be done tonight. My work week starts tomorrow.. I will make every effort to at least read #275 and post tomorrow after work (after I run errands, after I call my mortgage company, either to make a payment, if I have enough, or to be for leniency, if I don’t.) But no promises.

I’ll do my best to get caught up by this weekend.

I’m a bad blogger.